“But you don’t look sick?”: What is an invisible disability, anyway?

Invisible disability can look like this

Let’s backtrack a sec. How is disability — any disability — defined? According to the Americans With Disabilities Act (ADA), “A person with a disability is someone who:

·       has a physical or mental impairment that substantially limits one or more major life activities,

·       has a history or record of such an impairment (like cancer in remission), or

·       is perceived by others as having such an impairment (like someone with scarring from a severe burn).”

One of the major keywords here is “substantially limits.” Two people can have the same condition or diagnosis, but for one, it’s disabling, while for the other, it might barely be noticeable. And that can change over time, even day to day.

Another common myth? That to qualify as a disability, something must be constantly disabling. Spoiler alert: this is not how our bodies (or brains) work. Many chronic illnesses like diabetes, autoimmune conditions, or mental health disorders, fluctuate. People have good days, bad days, flare-ups, remissions, and everything in between. So, a person might look fine to you while internally feeling like a beat-up phone with a cracked screen, all the apps open, running on 3% battery, and no charger in sight.

Invisible disability can also look like this

These invisible illnesses impact millions of people. If you landed on my blog here, chances are you or people you love are living with one. So, when your disability is real to you but hidden from others, is it still valid? Absolutely. Just like that tree falling in the forest: it still makes a sound, even when no one’s around to hear it. And here’s the kicker: an invisible disability can take just as much work to manage as a visible one while still collecting all the stigma, shame, blame, and unsolicited advice from people who know everything because their cat has diabetes, or they follow this “expert” on social media, or they are BFF’s with “Dr. Google.”

Invisible disabilities deserve real respect. The truth is, you can’t see everything someone’s carrying, but that doesn’t mean it’s not heavy as hell.